I have something to confess I have an aversion to hugging, there I said it and it feels so good! I believe it is truly genetic, I come from a long line of non-huggers and we are all aware and totally ok with it. We are a family full of love and I believe the way we show it is much more meaningful than with a silly hug. Don’t get me wrong I don’t think there is anything wrong with hugs in fact there is one hug I never mind giving or receiving and that is my Gma Hall’s, there is a powerful love behind her hugs and I can feel it, plus she loves hugs more than anything, but she is easily classified as a “hugger.”

My extended/immediate family has often discussed the fact that we are not huggers and if for some reason we do hug it is ALWAYS a side hug, you know the not so committed one armed hug, this is the preferred hugging method amongst my mom’s family that is if a hug must happen. My sisters and I rarely hug and if we do we know it’s just not right. We have a deep love for one another and there is something refreshing about knowing it without a hug being involved. This post was inspired by last nights events as my little sis came over to say goodbye because she left back to Rhode Island today we chatted for a bit and then said our goodbyes I walked her out and she left, no hug, nor was one needed we know we love each other, right Kaitie?

Do non-huggers find other non-huggers? Not always, my mom and dad for instance, Mom – non-hugger Dad – Hugger. It was at least true in mine and Chad’s case he is also a non-hugger however I love being wrapped in Chad’s arms anytime, but that’s different! I have the best friends in the whole world I will never ever deny that, we care about each other so much and would do anything for one another, yes we hug but not all the time just the important times like weddings or if we haven’t seen each other in while.

I found a How-to on hugging on WikiHow.com for you huggers out there and even you non-huggers you might like to read up on this.

1. Approach the person. It will be easy. Depending on the person's relationship to you, you might want to approach differently:

Family Hug: Approach kindly, but not too emotionally.
Friend Hug (girls): Approach caringly, sometimes humorously, and smile.
Friend Hug (guys): Approach genuinely, smile sweetly and if he is hugging another just make it obvious you're uncomfortable and he'll feel you deserve a hug too
Crush Hug: Approach carefully, but do not seem shy. Smile slightly and perhaps say a caring word or two.
Lover Hug: It doesn't matter who starts this; either can make it just as romantic. When approaching, put your hands on their shoulders and look them in the eyes. Say you love them, how much you care for them, and how much you are loving every second with them. Then fall into each other and hug with all your heart.

2. Embrace. Lean forward and wrap your arms around the person.

Family Hug: You can keep talking when hugging; it will not ruin the momentum. Where you place your hands is not important; the hugged won't think it over too much. Press gently; it is not necessary to have head-contact. Stroke your hands quickly across the top of the hugged's back. Smile when letting go.
Friend Hug (girls): Close your eyes and think about how much you love your friend when hugging. Press as much as you feel like. (But don't squish!) Do not clap the hugged on the shoulders or such; some girls think you don't like them if you do it that way.
Friend Hug (guys): Embrace strongly, and clap each other on the top of your backs. If it's an emotional moment, keep in the hugged position for a brief moment and do not clap each others backs.
Crush Hug: Press the hugged warmly towards you. If you are a man, her arms should be around your neck, and you should be embracing her around the waist. When pressing her against you, you can lift her up a bit, pressing her chest and upper stomach against yours. Keep it in that position for a while, and then let go. Look her in the eyes when you separate and continue the conversation naturally. If you are the woman, put your arms behind his neck and press your chest lightly onto his chest.
Lover Hug: 1) Males: Carefully sliding both your hands down from her shoulders, put them on her waist and slide them around her lower back. Put your head on her shoulder and press her towards you for as long as you like. If you want to, you can give her a small massage with your hands, and try to warm her. When separating, you can look into her eyes, smile genuinely and, if the situation is fitting, kiss her like you mean it and include some hair massage. 2) Females: Extend your arms toward him and hold them around his neck and shoulders. Lean as close as possible and press your torso against his. In situations of extreme intimacy, interlocking your leg in his is appropriate. Avoid holding your arms below his shoulders and/or embracing strongly and tensely, even if you're about the same height as him. It might seem weird but it'll work!

3. Don't hug too tightly. The best way to judge how tightly or loosely to hug is to let whomever you're hugging indicate what they want by how hard they squeeze. If they are soft, be soft back; if they like bear hugs and squeeze tightly, hug back the same way (but don't suffocate him/her).

4. Don't let go too early. A hug is a powerful way to communicate your caring for another person, as it can feel great and greatly improve one's mood. If someone hugs you, they may want a long, loving hug (maybe they are upset or down), so just go along with it and hug them until they let go or loosen their hold. If you try to end it early, it may seem awkward for both of you.

A good approach no matter what your relationship with the person you'll be hugging is...walk up to them from a few (maybe 3) feet away, arms open. When you get to them, wrap your arms around approximately their midsection. Hold for a few seconds, then let go.

Let’s talk about #4, how long is too long? For me if I have to hug I like it to be as short as possible. I get that someone might need a long hug, but I’m pretty sure there is someone else out there willing to give you the hug of a lifetime and if there really is nobody else I might compromise a few seconds.

Any of you non-huggers out there trying to turn a new leaf and try the hugging thing well then the above tips are for you! I think they are quite funny and who knew there was so much that went into hugging? Just one more reason to stay away from it all together!

Warnings!

Do not confuse a friend hug with a lover hug. Things might get complicated and awkward. (this is my favorite!)
Unless you've hugged the person before, don't hug them without asking first. In addition, use your best judgment in choosing when and where to hug someone. There are certain situations where one might be embarrassed to be seen hugging someone else.
Hug only when the person you want to hug has their arms out, they may not want to be hugged if their arms aren't out.
Avoid a hug with a running start unless the person being hugged is aware you are about to do so, if not, this may result in both of you falling over.
Make sure you are not stinking when hugging, or else she will run away from you next time. Try to use mild deodorant on your body.
Bad breath may drive away your partner. Get your breath check before you proceed.

http://www.wikihow.com/Hug

To all of you non-huggers out there, there is nothing wrong with you it is perfectly normal to show your affection in other ways and to all of you huggers out there I have nothing against you and I actually admire you just think of this quote when you don’t get as many hugs from those of us non-huggers…